Christmas!

Picture Credits To Original Uploader at Deviantart - ~DreAminginDigITal

Winter is my favorite season. I have been mentioning it since very long now. Since two days, winter is building up and today when I went out to market for as long as 10 mere minutes, I felt I wasn’t going back alive.  It is so cold out here, my bones are freezing. That’s what I love about winters actually. Because I lived in a hill station for four years, I build a sort of competitive attitude towards chill. No doubt I always lose and in the end succumb to tugging my but with lots of chicken, switch on good music, switch on the halogen heater and go deep inside my quilt. Now, in which game losing is so much fun huh?  None.

Which reminds me, it’s Christmas; Ho ho ho! Ever since I learned about Santa and Christmas, every year on the night of 24^th I would leave my socks (not stockings) outside in the balcony for Santa to leave gifts. I wasn’t greedy you see; socks are smaller than stockings. But never mind, Santa never came! Guess he is too busy with whites! :P But well jokes apart, I have stopped performing this ordeal only very recently because I thought I was too grown up now (Auto Edit: He was caught by his nephew doing that). I know, I know I have been delusional all that time. But delusion is many a times a necessary evil and a necessary evil that brings happiness. Don’t we all deserve our fare share of happiness?

My hearty wishes to every friend, reader, and stalker (Auto Edit: Yeah sure, stalker!). May Christmas brings joy to your life and gifts to mine! Merry Christmas!

My favorite Christmas songs:

Let It Snow – Dean Martin

Happy X’mas (War is Over) – John Lennon

My favorite Christmas Movies:

Bad Santa

Home Alone Christmas

A Christmas Story

आवाज़ (Voice)

I am feeling guilty and shame at this very moment while I write theses words on my editor. If were not indebted to my parents for raising me so well, I would have left my fucking exams and joined the protests; but I cannot. For this, I feel extremely sorry towards the youth of my country! 

Every once in a while, during the moment when my conscious is about to go into the arms of sleep and my subconscious gets all worked for the night (day now a days), they meet and during that time, human intellect is on it's very high. At that time, many questions pester on my brain's grassland and one of those is - How Late Bhagat Singh might have felt on seeing, from heaven, the kind of people that we have become? Well, I am not sure about the elderly people, but right now if he is seeing the youth of India, he must be smiling ears to ears. The same hysteria, the same passion for the country, the same rage against the wrong, the same dignity towards self righteous acts. To all the brothers and sisters who underwent animal like treatment for that girl. Let my salutes reach you.

I cannot do much, sitting in my room, but one thing I can try my hand at - increasing your motivation. Not that you got any less of it, but extra help never fails does it? Here is a poem dedicated to you all from a wannabe poet:

आवाज़

मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे एक आवाज़ का वादा है
कितना कब तक सहेगी? कब तक रोने का इरादा है?

यूँ तो शोर में खो भी जाती हूँ
यूँ तो बरसों तक सो भी जाती हूँ |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे एक आईने का वादा है,
कभी तो खुद को पाना है, कभी तो ज़हन जगाना है||

मैं तो छोटी हूँ, दब भी जाती हूँ,
आसानी से डर के चुप भी जाती हूँ |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे बहते लहू का वादा है,
बहार निकल के कभी तो आना है, भय को कभी तो हराना है ||

खुद को अकेला समझ रुक भी जाती हूँ,
अकेला चना क्या भाड़ फोड़े सोच कर झुक भी जाती हूँ |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे एक जलसे का वादा है,
अब तो अकेली नहीं है तू, अब किस बात से कतराना है?

लाखों आवाजों के साथ मिल कर मैं भी एक पुकार बन गई,
लो अब तक जो बेजुबान थी वो क्रांती का व्याख्यान बन गई |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ मुझसे मेरी घुटन का वादा है,
शर्म की सीमा लांघ के जाना है, मर्यादा की बाधा तोड़ कर जाना है ||

अब तो अपने हक को पाना है,
अब तो गौरव को जगाना है,
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ मुझसे स्वाभिमान का वादा है
अब तो लड़ ले पगली, अब लड़ने में क्या जाता है?

मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ मुझसे सैकड़ों आवाजों का वादा है,
ऐसे ही जीना है तो चुप हो जा, हमारा तो कुछ और ही इरादा है ||

मैं नहीं था (I Wasn't There)

Do read the poem at the end of the article, that is the main part. Skip to the main part if you prefer!

It is very disgraceful to call ourselves humans any more! Humans don't commit such heinous crimes. The Monday night rape incident in Delhi has shook the country all together. There is a burning rage inside me and all I can do is type this bloody keyboard of mine. Well if this is the only way out, so be it. Let my frustration roll. 

I am much more angry on ourselves, the public, rather than on the people who raped that poor girl. Reason behind this is that if we would not have neglected all the rape cases that have been happening all around the country so far, this stage might have never come. But now, the bar has gone way beyond it's limits. Raise voices. Leave your comfort zone. Do what you can; at least think of a bad-ass death you can give to the accused, and post it on the internet. 

All evening, I have been reading comments of people all across the internet. Some of them have suggested such brutal punishments that it made me think who of the two are bigger sadists? We or the rape accused? Personally, what I think is, they must not be hanged; that punishment will be too much easy on them. They must be kept on an exile cutting off all the sources of social contact and entertainment a man can get. Whatever, my opinion won't matter.

I couldn't take the frustration anymore, I have to do a little something call studies too; exams are going on. So, I wrote a poem for that unseen, unsung sister of mine that lie on the hospital bed fighting with death. May god bring her to justice, and to peace.

मैं नहीं था -

जब तेरे मर्म बदन पर
चोटे पड़ी संगीन, अधर
माफ़ करना बहन , मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी प्यारी सूरत पर
गिद्ध कर गए वार, असर
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी चुनर पर
दाग लगे अटल, अचर
माफ़ करना बहन मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी काजल सी सुरमई आँखों पर
आंसू छलके, चीखें हुईं अकर्ण
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी लज्जा दी क़तर
जब शर्म से झुक पड़ा तेरा सर
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |

पर तू रोना नहीं, डरना भी मत
सब बदल जायेगा वादा है मेरा |
सूरज फिर निकलेगा, चाँद फिर दिखेगा
दर्द पिघल जायेगा वादा है मेरा ||

और जो इक्के दुक्के बार, याद आ भी गई वो रात
तो तुझे भर के सीने में सुला दूंगा मैं |
गिन लेंगे तारे, गुनगुना लेंगे गीत
तुझे लोरी सुना के सब भुला दूंगा मैं  ||

नींद मुझे नहीं आयेगी पर
सिर्फ इस बात का है डर
एक ही बात सताती है, करती है असर
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |

दीपावली

काफी दिनों से मेरे मन में था की मै हिंदी में कुछ लिखू || आज मौका भी है और दस्तूर भी | दुनिया के साथ साथ इस दीपावली में हमने भी सोचा की शुभ काम का जय श्री गणेश कर दिया जाए| हिंदी भाषा मुझे बहुत प्रीय है|  शायद आपको मालूम न हो पर लिखित कला से पहली मुलाकात मेरी हिंदी में ही हुई| कई कवितायें लिखीं, कई सुनाई, कुछ अनसुनी भी चल गयी, और कुछ तो सिर्फ वक़्त के पन्नो में खो सी गयी| पर जैसे जैसे स्कूल की किताबों से हिंदी हटती चली गयी, वैसे वैसे ज़हन से भी मिटती चली गईं| अब तो सिर्फ जुबां से निकलती है वो भी टूटी फूटी अंग्रेजी के साथ मिली हुई| ढंग से हिंदी बोलने वाले महापुरुष तो अब चंद ही बचे हैं|

खैर छोड़िये वो सब| बात करते हैं दिवाली की| चूँकि मैं बचपन से ही घर से दूर पढता आया हूँ त्यौहार वगैरा तो सब दोस्तों के साथ मौज करने के तरीके बन गए हैं, सिवाए दिवाली के| दिवाली अकेला ऐसा त्यौहार है जो मै साल दर साल, हर बार अपने घर परिवार के साथ ही मनाता आया हूँ| अंधे नवजात से ले कर भोले बचपन तक और भोले बचपन से ले कर चालाक जवानी तक का सफ़र जो मैंने इन 21 सालों में तय किया है, उसे हर साल एक बार नापने का जरिया दिवाली है| हर साल मुझमे कुछ बदला हुआ लगता है, और बदले हुए में ना ही सिर्फ मेरा वजन है बल्कि और भी कई चीज़े हैं!

बड़े ही सीधी साधी सरल दिवाली होती है छोटे जगह के लोगों की| सुबह जल्दी उठाना और घर की साफ़ सफाई एवं साज सज्जा करना| तरह तरह के फूल मिठाइयाँ इत्यादि लाये जाते हैं| मेरा तो एकल परिवार है, चहल पहल ही अलग रहती है| दुपहर होते होते औरतें रंगोली बनाने एवं श्याम के लिए पकवान इत्यादि तैयार करने में जुट जाती है तो उधर मर्द दिन भर की थकान को दूर करने के लिए जुआ खेलते हैं| कहते हैं यह "स्ट्रेस बस्टर" है| वाह रे दुनिया| श्याम ढलते ढलते मै और पिताजी छत्त पर जा कर दिए जलना शुरू कर देते है| यह हर साल मेरी दिवाली का सबसे प्रीय समय होता है| आज कल तो लोग दियो के नाम पे 'चाइनीज' बत्तियां जलाने लगे हैं जो दियों जैसी लगती है| समय महत्वपूर्ण है भैया कौन भगवान् वगैरा पे खर्चे| श्याम ढलती है और सारा परिवार पूजा के लिए एकत्रित होता है| एक दुसरे को बधाइयां दी जाती हैं| छोटे बड़ों के आशीर्वाद लेते हैं, बड़ा ही सुन्दर नज़ारा होता है| उसके बाद आतिशबाजियों का समा बंधता है| ऐसे तो लोग बड़ी बड़ी गाड़ियों में दफ्तर को अकेले निकल जायेंगे पर दिवाली आते ही बीवी से कहेंगे "डारलिंगज़ इस बार पटाखे नहीं जलाएंगे, गोइंग ग्रीन्ज़!" पर अब न तो पटाखों में न वो मजा रह गया है न तो आवाज़| नकलीपन का जमाना है या उम्र का तकाजा ये तो नहीं मालूम पर अब तो भतीजे भतीजियों को सँभालने में ही आतिशबाजियां छूट जाती हैं| "साले डरो मत" या "साले आगे जाके ढंग से जलाओ वरना अगर किसी को चिंगारी लगी तो बहुत जूते लगायेंगे" इत्यादि बोलते रहना पड़ता है| कर भी क्या सकते हैं भैया समय पे तो लगाम लगाना किसी के बास की बात है नहीं, ऐसा करके ही बचपन दोहोरा लेते हैं| हम पटाखे न जलाए तो क्या, कम से कम दिवाली को यादगार बनाने का इंतज़ाम तो कर ही सकते है।

चूँकि कहा है किसी महान व्यक्ति ने - "ज़िन्दगी लम्बी नहीं बड़ी होनी चाहिए!" तब तक,

अलविदा.

The Biriyani Quest

Scrumptious Mutton Biriyani!

I recently made a one day trip to Merut with two of my very good friends to meet Prateek (my best friend). We went there for business and business we did, until the last 3-4 hours of our exit. I was really skeptical about writing this at first, but decided this moment was too fun to let go! So here you are Ladies and some more Ladies, on this very exciting treasure hunting journey of four brave treasure hunters (well leave the brave part), and how they finally found victory (on second thoughts, leave the victory part too)! Lets take you to where it all began!

It all started with a night (it so does with every fucked up story)! A night where three huntsman, drunk to their gut, were making plans on meeting their fourth companion and the only one who knew the way to the treasure. The treasure, as you may know, is the sultry and delicious Biriyani, ready to be eaten till the lasts of the cocks... wait let me redo it, lasts of the chickens' only remain. Fuck! I think I am overdoing this Pirate of the Caribbean thing. Let me come back to my moron self.

We were supposed to reach Merut the next day by 9:00 clock. In case you are already laughing, I give you a reason to laugh much more fervently. I promised to be their on time on the cost of ten kicks on my butt. After I was back from Merut, I didn't walked for two days. Whatever. We slept a 'bit' late, okay not a bit late but very late and the best time at which we could have left was 1:00 pm the next day. And so we left. After a grumpy journey of 4 hours, we finally reached the place.

Fast Forward: kicks, cries, abuses, sound of chewing (the best of the world I know) butter chicken (Envy me mere mortal!), discussions, some more abuses, laughs, some more abuses, etc. etc. 
 Hope you got the drift. Now the final and the most amazing part of the story: The next day, four of us ready to leave for Delhi at 2'O clock, but not before we have the envious Biriyani!


We reached the old Ghantaghar area. The site was tremendous and ugly at the very same time. Eid ul-Zuha (popularly know as Bakreed) was around and so goats and buffaloes were being sold at every nook and corner we went. And then happened something I was terribly afraid of. One after the another all our options for having Biriyani closed. Somewhere the stocks were finished and somewhere the shop was closed. But with determinations in our head, hunger in our stomach and slippers on our feet, we kept on searching for a legitimate place that served Biriyani. I took us three hours and a complete tour of the old part of the city to finally reach a place that served Biriyani.. Now, Merut has a legacy of selling food for minimal prices and it tastes equally awesome. But a plate of Biriyani which otherwise would have cost us very less, cost us 150 bucks per plate. And it was really bad. Bad as in KRK (Kamal R Khan) kinda bad. My mood was pretty effed up! Biriyani is God's own food, and we have no right to make it, unless we are pretty good at it. And so ends our journey for Biriyani.

The trip was none the less a good one. We had a lot of fun the whole time and I cannot suppress my urge of using this Hindi word - Bakchodi. हम लोगो ने बोहोत बकचोदी पेली (we did a lot of Bakchodi)!


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Until next time,
Adios!

P.S. - If you ever plan to go to Merut for a day or two, you can buzz me on my page and i will tell you where in Merut you can find all your pleasantries. And when I say all, I mean all! ;)

Naani (Grandmother)

Date : 11 July, 2012

This article may be off the records but something inside me (no you idiot it's not my stomach!) tells me that I must get this article to the world. Right now I am sitting beside my maternal grandmother and watching her die, counting her last breaths. I have seen her in the best of her forms, well, sort-of-best of her forms; and now seeing her lying there on the bed waiting to pass is really disturbing.

It's funny, but for some reason, I have no memories of me spending a lot of time with her. Still, I feel sick even by the thought of her leaving this world. The best memory of mine with her would be she taking me to the Saturday  market of Allahbad, where vendors would sell all type of caged animals and sweets. Whenever I visited my grandmother's, I wouldn't miss it for the world. And now for the rest of my life, the last memory of hers that would be imprinted on my mind, would be of her dying so miserably.

Though we are doing the best we can do to keep her alive, a part of me wants to release her from the cage that her body has become for her. I probably hope that she too wants to leave her body forever. Death is a funny concept in a way. We know it is sure to come, still we are scared of it the most. A very hard truth is, no matter how much sad we become on someone's death, a part of us always feels comfort by the fact that we are still alive. It's funny how sometimes death's preference is so high over life. How sometimes failure seems the only victory left to achieve! Doctor says she is listening and seeing everything but not registering anything in her mind. Relatives say that she will give up her breaths after she has seen me for one last time. I am the only son of her only daughter. High hopes are running on me. And now that she has seen me, all everyone can wish of is her death.

It's kind of haunting, to see someone die such a miserable death. Every bit of celluloid of my grandma's body has worn off. Bed sores are appearing on every other corner of the body. Teeth are deteriorating and breath is all she has got in her body. Once beautiful her face, is now a sunken piece of skull covered with epidermis. I can only think of what she might be going through.


Dated : 14 July, 2012

I took a leave from her today! I bid adieu to grandma one last time (probably the last), even though I know she doesn't even recognize who is coming or going. She just cries and through a lost corners of her eyes, omits what ever little water remains in her body. Life is a bitch for sure!

Edit:(I cannot reveal the date)
The news of her demise arrived this morning. I had a mix of expressions. Shock, sad, somewhat happy too because she got rid of her pains. Will that stop me from doing my regular chores? No! As a wise man once said, 'The Show Must Go On' and this is the only truth the world follows.

Quoting Pink Floyd (The Show Must Go On)


Ooooh, Ma, Oooh Pa
Must the show go on?
Ooooh, Pa. Take me home
Ooooh, Ma. Let me go

There must be some mistake
I didnt mean to let them
Take away my soul.
Am I too old, is it too late?

Ooooh, Ma, Ooooh Pa,
Where has the feeling gone?
Ooooh, Ma, Ooooh Pa,
Will I remember the songs?
The show must go on.

Until next time (if there is any),

Adios!

10 Characteristics Of Engineers

1. Engineer Always Do Things Right Before The Deadline

A very typical habit of engineers. There are many engineers who complete their work on time, I agree, but most of them wait for the last day to arrive and scare the shit out of them to make them actually move their heavy load of ass. Notably though, even on the edge, they perform the given task fairly (sometimes exceptionally) well. And what do they do with the rest of the given time? Trade secret!

2. Engineers Are Warehouses Of Soft Addiction :

In case you don't know what a soft addiction is, it is an addiction to anything other than drugs,alcohol or cigarette. There is no fucking trade secret to what engineers do in the meantime allotted for a given task. Soft Addictions are very commonly spotted amongst engineers. With piracy and accessibility on its full boom, getting movies, daily soap operas and games is not a big task. Further, they are so fucking incredible, one cannot resist getting addicted.

3. Engineers Are Socially Creepy

With almost no social life inside and outside the campus and soft addictions riding all over them, Engineers start doubting their social capabilities, not that they have any. Slowly and gradually, that very doubt gets converted into a disease of sorts called 'social creepiness'. Prime symptoms include 'drooling over women in public', 'sweating in front of someone speaking about something that does not include women,alcohol and engineering' etc.

4. Engineers Have Never Met The Creature Called 'Girlfriend' -

No social life means no wooing power over girls. To top it off, a very minimal count of opposite sex on the board, out which only few of them deserve to be called beautiful or hot or sexy. And if this wasn't worse, all are committed to a guy in a long distance relationship. Does he fuckin' pays your McDonald's bills? IF at all a few of them remain uncommitted, you have to fight through an army of goons to reach her and another army of goons to keep her. Makes you think you are better off without them huh?

5. Engineers Love Their Pornography

Though no engineer would openly buy the fact, deep within they very well know that this is true.No girlfriend means loneliness and a guy with a computer connected to the internet will eventually end up watching porn no matter what. And computers? we have a helluva lot of them with us. I know a guy whose porn collection can give Brazzers a run for their money.
Please note this girls that we are not nymphomaniacs, we are just...um, whatever forget that!

6. Engineers Are Highly Addicted to Cigarette,Alcohol and Other 'Good Things'

Porn is not the only thing that removes loneliness right? There are better things to kill time (and yourself) like drinking! And Oh boy! we drink. When I started my first year, few people were involved in smoking or drinking. But as the time passed by, people started smoking or drinking and now a major part of the institution is infected. Are you infected yet?

7. Engineers Don't Know What Body Clock Is

or at least they don't know how to follow it. How can a drunk guy can after all? A funny incident: When I sleep and wake up late at home, my father heavily doubts my ability to attend classes and give exams. He has no fucking idea what goes on here. My record? Non stop cramming for about 24 hours and giving the paper without sleeping and scoring 59. Beat that Bitch!

And the College Diaries award goes to a friend of mine who drank almost 3 full whiskey for 18 to 20 hours, sleeping for 2 hours, driving to a friend's house for 1 hour and then drinking again 2 and a half more for another 18 hours ! College Diaries salute you!


8. Engineers Have The Most Fucked Up Body structure Ever Possible

True Story! If you a spot a guy with puffy eyes, lost looks, unshaven beard and a body figure not even the creators of Geometry can specify; you have probably spotted an engineer. All that drinking and waking up through the night takes a heavy toll on the body and results are pretty much screwed up!

9.  Engineers Hate The Fact That They Are Engineers

"Isse accha to B.Com kar lete yaar D.U. se, kahaan fass gaye! (We might have better done B.Com. from Delhi University rather than being an engineer)" is a phrase that echoes a lot amongst engineers. No one is nuts enough to do something that they hate unless forced upon to do so. Most of the of the engineers are actually career cases that had no other options than engineering in career to choose from. But intimacy from something overtime develops love and dare you call something bad about engineering in front of an Engineer. He will break your head if he can or cry out loud.

[A cheat trick: Tell an engineer that he wouldn't get a job when he would graduate and he would burn to his guts]


10. Engineers Have A Spirit To Die For

But come what may, Engineers always touch the finish line and survive. And in life, that is the most important thing!

All that kidding apart now. A salute to every engineer in every corner of this country. If you have, by any means, passed all your semesters without having a back I know what you might have probably gone through. Problems are a part of everyone's life, but life is a part of the problems inside the campus. With 240 tests, 50 assignments, 4 projects, unlimited deadlines, umpteen fights, first crushes and first loves, deadly fights, social and peer pressure, friendships and lose ends one faces in the campus, any other pressure of life looks too small to even count. And if it were not for our undying spirit, the world would not have been a better place. After all, we are the FUTURE!

♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦

If you think I have missed something, or you have a better version to tell, feel free to fill up the comment box! :) Until next time,

Adios


P.S.: You might have noticed that by far each point, except the last one, logically followed the previous one (or you didn't?). There was a reason behind this construction and a reason behind why I mentioned it in the last point. If you are thinking I was showing off my intellectual shit; you are damn right! ;)

Guru (Teacher)

I am 21 now and life has passed in front of my eyes in a blink. It is one year since the inception of this blog and my excitation is on a fairly high level, for more reasons than one. A lot has happened in past 10 days. I formed an Event Management company and did its first event and in the process learned the hooks and nooks of business. Did fairly well in exams. And today was unexpectedly awesome. Today is also the first anniversary of this blog, though not much is written on it. A lot has been said, a lot is yet untold. But then, what would remain of life when all that has to come is revealed all at once!

Because of an early away-from-home-schooling that I got, I have seen a variety of teachers. Some were bad some were good and some were weird. But every one of them gave me something I didn't had. Because of the positive outlook that I possess, I tend to see the best in people most of the time and I learned a lesson from somewhere that says - "Every man in this world, no matter how meager he is, has something unique to give you which no other man can." There is a special anecdote that I want to share that has not been shared with any one ever before.

I was in a coaching institute in Kota and was taught by some of the best minds of this country. In them was our head-of-department Mathematics cum Head Coordinator that taught us Mathematics. Now, I had no fucking clue what he used to teach because during those times I used to bunk a lot. Also I wasn't even familiar with his temperament though I heard a lot about his sudden display of anger. When ever I attended his lectures, I used to be shit scared that he would, at some point of the class, find that all this time he was speaking to someone who is a dumb-ass thinking of him to be a decent scholar. And then the moment of truth arrived. He gave us a question and started taking rounds of class when he suddenly found out I was just sitting idle doing nothing.

But, to my very disbelief, instead of shouting and scolding at me he very gently asked me to try and solve the question. I stared at my notebook for a few minutes and that is exact the amount of time it took him to understand that I wasn't the brightest of the lot. He said he is noticing me for a few days now and knew there is no way on earth I could have done that question. But no scolding? No throwing out of the class? He said he saw a scope of improvement in me and that I can do great things if showed the right path. Now people stop only at telling you these kind of things, but he actually guided me to my way. He counseled me for some 15 minutes and gave advice on everything from career to personal life. He did what a true mentor must, show the path to eternity. The right path.

Until next time,

Adios!

A Day In The Life Of An Engineer

There is no denying the fact that engineers all across the world are weirdest of the species. Not only they are semi-intellectual freaks, but also are socially degenerated. That is how world sees them. The story though is a bit different.

Though engineers all around the globe are different, yet they possess stark similarities in their life styles. Here I explain a typical day in the life of an engineer, which will obviously be me!

Weekdays

1. Every day, after I wake up, first thing to come out of my mind is God's name. Though the second thing always is - "Fuck! I'm late." Yes, for no good reason to back the fact, engineers always sleep late at night. Pass the frontbenchers and the nerd types, any engineer sleeping before the midnight is a rare sight.

2. Then starts a 45 minute rush of getting up, attending nature's call, brushing and bathing (conditions apply*) and getting ready for the class. And in between that, happens a lot of cursing and scolding and abusing to clear up the slots for the bathrooms and for missing slippers/shirts/trousers/towels/underwear and what not!

3. Finally ready, I ride on my motorcycle and reach college in ten minutes, in the process bypassing the road jams. Having a bike really helps and saves some 10 more extra minutes for sleep. People traveling in auto-rickshaws on the other hand have a hard time in the traffic jams.

4. If I manage to reach the first class within the first 10 minutes of its inception, I will be lucky enough to get the attendance. If not, scolding and lectures, plus no attendance. Attendance is the key! If it were not for attendance, 70% of the population wouldn't even show up even once for the lectures.

5. Rest of the day is almost the same for every self respecting 20 year old of this country. Boring lectures and scolding professors. If it weren't for my friends and gossip, I cannot even imagine surviving lectures all through the day.

6. After a whole lot of brain busting, as soon as I reach home, I crash on bed. If there are no tasks lined up like meeting a friend/making food/cleaning etc. I would sleep.

7. Then begins the night, the favorite part of my day. It depends how one utilizes it. Some prefer watching a movie and some prefer playing cards. I prefer playing games or read a book or write something. Studies? Are you fuckin' kidding me? 

That my friend is the end of a weekday.

Weekends

1. What rain is to a heating body is what weekends are to the engineers or to any mortal for the matter of fact. After a freaking 5 days of daily torture for 8 hours, one finally gets to unwind. Though I may not guarantee all 5 of the weekdays were not bunks, a holiday is a holiday after all. 

2. Now, people do stuff on weekend nights. Many go to restaurants, drink, play cards etc. Some lucky bastards who have the luxury of a girl friend stick to their phones the whole god damn night! Feviquick, here they are! I like a sort of a get together of friends and talk through the night. High frequency intellectual shit is emitted in these kind of meetings, mixed with a heavy dose of slangs.Heavy informational facts are exchanged, out of which, many are either irrelevant, inaccurate or made up. Men!

3. The next morning, or afternoon rather, is a sure-shot hangover for some and a day followed by a lot of boredom for many. Even though how much I hate to admit it, Sunday and Saturday afternoons are usually boring and long. A wise guy once said - "You cannot appreciate the miracle of a bunk unless you have attended a fair amount of chickenshit lectures." That wise guy is none other than me. *lovely wink*

4. The life again goes inside a 'for' loop (sorry for the nerd that gets out of me every now and then) and the errands of meeting up deadlines (though none of them are met) and completing assignments (every word of which is copied from an authentic source) continues. 

Engineers are always running short of time. Out of all the chaos that we go through every day, how can one possibly do anything unconventional or out of the box. Top it off with the meager count of the opposite sex present, out of which 80% are lunatic looking! And then you call us sociopaths huh? Start respecting engineers, or we would stop inventing stuff for you! (*wink-of-attitude*) Until next time,

Adios!

Dost (Friend)

"A Friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of Nature."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882) US poet & essayist.

Out of many questions that pester around my conscious, one question that stands out the most is - 'Does the end justifies the means?' The result may well reserve a place in the gray area, but today I beg to differ. My answer today will be a Yes. Looking behind at the past two years of my life and seeing the way I have shaped up (figuratively), I may roll the name of my fast friends in the credits. No man is perfect and never will become one, but the journey towards perfection gets a hasty pace while friends are around. They have cursed and beaten me and scolded me though also supplying me with a heavy load of love. All that just to make me a person that I am today. And by the looks of it, I think I am getting better by the day.

Let me just pass the general obligations of 'why friendship day is celebrated' and stuff. Now that I own a personal space in the Webville, this blog, I am publically showing my affection towards my friends. I am a man in my early twenties and at this age precisely, men are not very good at expressing compassion. But it does not means that my love is absent. I am still very fond of giving pecks on my mother's cheek and diddling around my father to let him buy me a new gadget (earlier I did that for toys). I am still very protective about my sisters and cousins though it is very rare that I call them up and talk it out. Same thing goes for my friends. I may not get much time (though I am absurdly clueless why because I do absolutely nothing), but that does not means that I won't take out some if they call for it.

This article goes out to all the people I have ever met and had a bond of friendship with. If I made a mistake, I am all apologies (Nirvana style). If you ever hurt me, well I am still searching. Kidding. Yes, drinking together and passing out and checking out girls is one part of a friendship, but on the deeper side, friends are nothing less than an alternate family. Specially for me and all the people who are and have been studying away from their home. 

Love you all ♥ :) Until next time,

Adios!

P.S. - Guys form my flat, if you are reading, where the hell are my brand new pair of socks? :|

Railgaadi (Train)

Since my childhood, I have been completely amazed by the trains. Amazed by the way they connect people and places and amazed by the size and possibilities of them and amazed by the way they work and by the fact that how much a common person depends on them. I remember, when I was a child, my father wouldn't let me stand at the gate of the coach and get off at stations (considering the fact that I was one hell of a bastard during my childhood). At that time, I so desperately wanted to grow up. And then, I grew up and I did what I wanted to do. I would stand on the gate for long hours, watching everything pass by. I don't know why, but for some reason, standing on a racing train's door gives me a feeling of immense power and freedom,
a feeling I rarely get. Standing on a train's gate while it is moving at 100km/hr and seeing it turn is amazing. All that fast blowing wind that falls on your face and takes away your aroma into the thin air to let it finally vanish is excruciating. If you have not stood on a pacing train's door ever before, you are most certainly having issues. And if that was not all for issues, I have a hefty count of friends that have never been on a train ever before. I sometimes don't buy the fact that there actually are people who have never traveled in a train in their whole god damn life. And then you call yourself sane huh? How can one stay away from such a humongous phenomenon?

The only thing that I hate about trains is that one can hardly sleep in it. At least I cannot. But, though I may contradict with myself, it is also the best thing (sometimes). I wake up through the night, looking outside the window. Mind you that I didn't say seeing because seeing is watching something and registering it in your mind. Looking is... well, just looking. Yeah, so I look outside the window whole night- into the eternity, small and big towns, woods, farms and fields. And think, not about the farms, but about everything else not even remotely related to them. Now don't tell me you haven't been philosophical about life at some point while traveling (or is it only me?). I think about my past events, the dark ones and the bright ones. About people who are in my life and about people who were in my life. About things I would do in future. Here, I share a little secret with you guys. After every train journey of mine (which are always quite big), I have a brand new business plan that would shake the world (though none of them see the light of the day) After all this thinking, I shift to watching movies and all and yeah, sometimes writing too. This one is written while I am on train.

It so happened that I didn't got a reservation in an AC coach in the train back to home this time and by the call of acute helplessness of events, here I am sitting in a sleeper coach after an eternity. Since past 3-4 years, the only time that I have been in a sleeper coach is to escort some illiterate guy in it. If you have never been in a sleeper coach before go be there. But on second thoughts, don't go. Wait. Whatever! Do what you deem right; I hold no responsibility for your actions. And for the sake of readers who wither away from even the name of the train, I may try and explain what goes in there. It is not easy mind you. Many veterans have tried to explain that scenario and I hold a social obligation of matching up to them. Let’s see if I can.

Every sleeper class coach of the Indian Railways train is almost the same. Loud noises of babies and children crying and weeping echoes almost during 50% of your journey. The Oh! So sweet smell of freedom (human wastes) makes you feel rejuvenated (sick in pants) all the time. People smoke and drink (both of which are not allowed) on their respective seats like it’s one of their yoga routines. The compartments are full of people traveling without ticket as if the train is some fucking property of theirs. Curses and slangs are chanted so frequently that you soon forget they actually were curses and slangs. Using a washroom (if you find a vacant one that is) is a task roughly on the level of Fear Factor's array of tasks. But then, finding a cleaner one is even more difficult. Patches of beetelnut juice on the floor are so many that you can count them and pass a good amount of time (me and my cousin came out with this game of counting patches when we were a bit young). So yeah! This is pretty much what it is . I know it sounds really scary but it is not (it's scarier).

The moment of truth that I faced while traveling this time was that a middle aged couple with two young daughters (probably 8 and 5) were traveling in the same compartment. I was sitting on a window seat and reading, when one of the two girls (the elder one) called me and said "Uncle, let me sit near the window" (What?! Uncle? She was so not getting the window seat now!). I was too involved in reading to pay attention to her childhood fantasies. She was quite a brat and irritated me a lot. I wasn't really impressed by her cuteness and she chanting words like alien attack and transform shape (Ben Ten, you have ruined the younger ones of my country! You owe me one) were not helping either. There was no way I was leaving window seat. Sad by my denial, She did what every helpless child does, call her parents for help. Now, his father was gray enough to realize that I am not one of the regular visitors of the sleeper coach and only a ticket problem must have led me here in the sleeper coach. He on the other hand was not ...rich. There is no nicer way to put it. There is never a nicer way to put the harsh realities of someone's life in front of him. He cannot ask a man superior than himself in education and money to just get up and make place for her daughter. Who is he after all? He asked his daughter to shut up and sit down where she finds place. I then did something that I am really proud of. I got up and shifted and made place for the little girl solely to let that girl believe that her father is a hero. Her father's gaze met mine and I reassured him of one thing - "There is still a little bit of good left in this world!" Until next time,

Adios!

Pehla (First)

Life has always been about first timers. The magic lies in the first occurrence itself. Second time, though how delightful it may seem, our mind knows that it knows what's happening. The first rain, the first kiss, first baby, first movie in a theater, first motor bike, first day in college. If someone doesn't stop me, I can go on and on about it.

The funny part is though that how much special we want everything, that is our first time, to be. It is like a continuous quest with ourselves. A quest to hold that moment in time when it is happening and to make it as picture perfect as we can. Not to mention we miserably fail most of the times. Picture perfect is a myth. I am no different when it comes to make my first experience worth remembering. I too want my every first experience to be as perfect as it possibly can be. But that's not what actually happens. You want to know how was my first day at college? First up an embarrassing welcome by The Bastards (I lovably call my teachers that :-) ), then an accident on the road (not that I got injured), a guy from my college (who in future becomes a jerk who calls me for help every now and then) takes me up for a tease and takes a heavy treat from me and the day ends with a mild ragging by Fourthies (mild as I have seen way worse than what they can possibly dream of). Not so special for a first timer eh? The second day though was a miracle. How? Well, let's just keep it as a secret for a while.

I find it really funny that the people who walk around with camera on every bloody occasion of their life have no idea of what they are actually missing with their naked eyes. So much for being picture perfect. And just as I was losing hopes on every first timers, a funny thing happened this morning. Read on.

Since I was very young, I have always missed a chance of experiencing the first rain of the season. And just to assume and know what rain means to me, go here. Though I couldn't recall any reason for that, the point is I have never done that. My mom always says not to bathe in the first few rains of the monsoon but what a screwdriver does to screws, Yash Aswani does to rules. I once took a bath in one of the first few rains and guess what? I ended up having scratches all over my body. Did I care? Hell no! Still, I always missed the first on. Coming to the point. It's early morning for the world and late night for me. And guess what? It's raining. There is a lovely song struck to my ears, I am writing and enjoying rain with a hot cup of tea. This is the first rain of the season and I took a quick bath too. Feeling delightful. Got a relief after all those days of heat wave.

So you see, sometimes waiting for things to happen and not pushing them too hard may get you where you want to go. Not everything in life can be made picture perfect, but changing the definitions of how much picture perfect you want everything to be will remove the extra pressure. What else is life all about than adjustments? Until next time,

Adios.

Birhaa (Separation)

Every time there are holidays, I am the one amongst my friends and acquaintances  who goes last from Greater Noida (probably). Almost always a day later. And the feeling of bidding everyone good bye and then staying alone after that is really draining. I may announce in annoyance that it has been 9 years since I am studying away from home, but still, a human heart is a human heart. And what a human heart needs most during these times is a company. A company that is good. But heck, at this time, I would even talk to Rakhi Sawant for hours. It's not that I have a problem staying alone, rather I am very good at that art, but living without problems is not always living peacefully mind you. The roads are deserted as if a curfew has recently been announced. Ansal Plaza is.. well, empty. Feels very strange, roaming in a building that is so big yet so empty (and they crave about space huh?)!  Familiar faces in crowds are absent (Wait! You said crowd?).  Nothing seems good enough - Games, Food, Movies, Songs, and another pretty things not worth mentioning. I swear I don't miss my home too much, not enough to crave me meet them. You might call me a spineless jerk, but this is a truth. I have been raised over pain, and pain makes you strong. It's just that I desperately need to get surrounded by a few familiar faces. I am a bit lonely.

Everything in life has an essence of separation. An air of dislocation. Probably, separation is the biggest truth human heart has ever discovered after death. In a way, death itself is a separation, from this mad-mad world. Even after years of staying away from home, I feel butterflies in my stomach when I have to leave a place I am already settled in to a place that I would have to settle in. If I stay a week at home,I get creepy even by the thoughts of leaving it. You know, great food, reputation, mother, siblings and peace. Specially the sunsets. During my stay at home, I ride my bike across the fields of rice and cane and watch the sun set. Beautiful moment I tell you. Leaving all this is not comforting. And about Greater Noida, well I love the overdose of freedom I get here. Freedom is a lethal weapon and I know how to use it wisely. *wink*

I have seen(felt) separation from many friends over the years but still haven't got used to it. Every time it is a similar kind of confusion yet very different in itself. I dread the day when I would be leaving college, but lets not think about it right now. 
Separation is painful, but it is bearable, I know . Life moves on, and it carries you along. A journey where you meet companions, and then you leave them at some point or the other. This is a never ending process of destiny. God's personal 'so called' master plan. The dirtiest humor of fate. Strike a smile and whistle a song. That will make the journey a bit exiting.

Happy Holidays! :) Until next time,

Adios! ;)

Khamoshi (Silence)

'Well timed silence hath more eloquence than speech!'

I believe silence has a language of its own. Everyone does. Life is very good at giving examples I know. We all have been given some of them. Silence is much more than not talking. It may inspire haunt, at the same time it may show love. You can express anger with it, you can convey sorrow with it. What water is to colours is what silence is to expressions. We human beings have an inborn talent of 'listening' silence, especially of those whom we love. Mothers are pretty good at the game. I remember a night when I was shit depressed and needed to talk to someone badly. I called my mom and when she picked up I wasn't able to speak. I was choking. She, after ten seconds, understood that something is wrong. "Is something wrong beta?" and there I was, crying like a five year old. Yeah I know that is a sissy thing to do but when you are in a dangling state of mind, even the smallest stroke of love is capable enough to break you down. If, God forbid, ever in your life you meet depression, it won't leave(if it eventually does leave you because I believe some part of it always stays) you with fond memories to cherish with. Sadness apart. Here is a contrast of silence at play.


1. A silence of hatred -
Alcohol again. I am yet to categorize alcohol as an enemy or a friend. The other night's party ended up in a fight that was pretty-fucking bad. And when we returned to our senses (and hangover free state of mind), there were bruises, not on our bodies but on our hearts. A part of me died that night. Things like these make you believe that world is a bad place to be in. After spending a whole day not talking to each other we reached a point where we had to draw conclusions. It's hard to know people very well but not talk to them. It kills to feel hatred towards someone whom you loved until last night. There we were in a room, not talking. Staying mum. Pin drop silence was given run for its money. Silence, at its brief best. You could hear the clock ticking as if loudspeakers were connected to it. As if everyone was asking each other burning questions, without uttering a word. Things are pretty much better now, but that moment is the one that made me write this. I so desperately wanted to let it out on my keyboard (times of pen are coming to an end). Life is strange; it's sadly funny to see how ego overcomes love.

2. A silence of love -

Lectures are boring. Professors suck. It was yet another boring lecture at my IIT-JEE coaching in Kota. I wouldn't have been sitting in the class if it wasn't for her. Yes, there were times when I was hopelessly in love. I always took a seat that made it really easy for me to see her across the other row clearly. If smiles were a commodity to be sold in retail, she would have been a millionaire. If you ask me what is the definition for cuteness?  I would show you her face. Dimples, like pits so deep, it would put Indian roads to shame. There was a hint of melancholy on her face, and if it didn't kill me to see her being sad, I would have put that expression on her face forever. Seeing her inspired me to be a better person, a better human being. But I never told her a damn thing. I never gained enough gut to do it. I used to sort of stalk her. I use to stare at her all day long during lectures (I didn't realized it then that how much foolish was that to do). She didn't take it in a very good fashion. Hell! Which girl would? But that lecture, that day, was different. It was one of the many defining moments of my life. I was staring at her and after a moment I found her staring at me. Our eyes met. Our gazes were attached to each other for really long (25 minutes). I was speaking without 'talking'. She smiled for me, for the very first time and kept smiling. I felt out of this world. That day is still one of the most special days of my life. Love needs no language they say, and I couldn't agree more! What happened afterwards is a secret to keep (or to be shared when the right time comes). *wink*


Liked it? Hated it? Tell me via comments. Feedback is valuable. Until next time,

Adios.