Christmas!

Picture Credits To Original Uploader at Deviantart - ~DreAminginDigITal

Winter is my favorite season. I have been mentioning it since very long now. Since two days, winter is building up and today when I went out to market for as long as 10 mere minutes, I felt I wasn’t going back alive.  It is so cold out here, my bones are freezing. That’s what I love about winters actually. Because I lived in a hill station for four years, I build a sort of competitive attitude towards chill. No doubt I always lose and in the end succumb to tugging my but with lots of chicken, switch on good music, switch on the halogen heater and go deep inside my quilt. Now, in which game losing is so much fun huh?  None.

Which reminds me, it’s Christmas; Ho ho ho! Ever since I learned about Santa and Christmas, every year on the night of 24^th I would leave my socks (not stockings) outside in the balcony for Santa to leave gifts. I wasn’t greedy you see; socks are smaller than stockings. But never mind, Santa never came! Guess he is too busy with whites! :P But well jokes apart, I have stopped performing this ordeal only very recently because I thought I was too grown up now (Auto Edit: He was caught by his nephew doing that). I know, I know I have been delusional all that time. But delusion is many a times a necessary evil and a necessary evil that brings happiness. Don’t we all deserve our fare share of happiness?

My hearty wishes to every friend, reader, and stalker (Auto Edit: Yeah sure, stalker!). May Christmas brings joy to your life and gifts to mine! Merry Christmas!

My favorite Christmas songs:

Let It Snow – Dean Martin

Happy X’mas (War is Over) – John Lennon

My favorite Christmas Movies:

Bad Santa

Home Alone Christmas

A Christmas Story

आवाज़ (Voice)

I am feeling guilty and shame at this very moment while I write theses words on my editor. If were not indebted to my parents for raising me so well, I would have left my fucking exams and joined the protests; but I cannot. For this, I feel extremely sorry towards the youth of my country! 

Every once in a while, during the moment when my conscious is about to go into the arms of sleep and my subconscious gets all worked for the night (day now a days), they meet and during that time, human intellect is on it's very high. At that time, many questions pester on my brain's grassland and one of those is - How Late Bhagat Singh might have felt on seeing, from heaven, the kind of people that we have become? Well, I am not sure about the elderly people, but right now if he is seeing the youth of India, he must be smiling ears to ears. The same hysteria, the same passion for the country, the same rage against the wrong, the same dignity towards self righteous acts. To all the brothers and sisters who underwent animal like treatment for that girl. Let my salutes reach you.

I cannot do much, sitting in my room, but one thing I can try my hand at - increasing your motivation. Not that you got any less of it, but extra help never fails does it? Here is a poem dedicated to you all from a wannabe poet:

आवाज़

मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे एक आवाज़ का वादा है
कितना कब तक सहेगी? कब तक रोने का इरादा है?

यूँ तो शोर में खो भी जाती हूँ
यूँ तो बरसों तक सो भी जाती हूँ |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे एक आईने का वादा है,
कभी तो खुद को पाना है, कभी तो ज़हन जगाना है||

मैं तो छोटी हूँ, दब भी जाती हूँ,
आसानी से डर के चुप भी जाती हूँ |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे बहते लहू का वादा है,
बहार निकल के कभी तो आना है, भय को कभी तो हराना है ||

खुद को अकेला समझ रुक भी जाती हूँ,
अकेला चना क्या भाड़ फोड़े सोच कर झुक भी जाती हूँ |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ, मुझसे एक जलसे का वादा है,
अब तो अकेली नहीं है तू, अब किस बात से कतराना है?

लाखों आवाजों के साथ मिल कर मैं भी एक पुकार बन गई,
लो अब तक जो बेजुबान थी वो क्रांती का व्याख्यान बन गई |
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ मुझसे मेरी घुटन का वादा है,
शर्म की सीमा लांघ के जाना है, मर्यादा की बाधा तोड़ कर जाना है ||

अब तो अपने हक को पाना है,
अब तो गौरव को जगाना है,
मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ मुझसे स्वाभिमान का वादा है
अब तो लड़ ले पगली, अब लड़ने में क्या जाता है?

मैं एक आवाज़ हूँ मुझसे सैकड़ों आवाजों का वादा है,
ऐसे ही जीना है तो चुप हो जा, हमारा तो कुछ और ही इरादा है ||

मैं नहीं था (I Wasn't There)

Do read the poem at the end of the article, that is the main part. Skip to the main part if you prefer!

It is very disgraceful to call ourselves humans any more! Humans don't commit such heinous crimes. The Monday night rape incident in Delhi has shook the country all together. There is a burning rage inside me and all I can do is type this bloody keyboard of mine. Well if this is the only way out, so be it. Let my frustration roll. 

I am much more angry on ourselves, the public, rather than on the people who raped that poor girl. Reason behind this is that if we would not have neglected all the rape cases that have been happening all around the country so far, this stage might have never come. But now, the bar has gone way beyond it's limits. Raise voices. Leave your comfort zone. Do what you can; at least think of a bad-ass death you can give to the accused, and post it on the internet. 

All evening, I have been reading comments of people all across the internet. Some of them have suggested such brutal punishments that it made me think who of the two are bigger sadists? We or the rape accused? Personally, what I think is, they must not be hanged; that punishment will be too much easy on them. They must be kept on an exile cutting off all the sources of social contact and entertainment a man can get. Whatever, my opinion won't matter.

I couldn't take the frustration anymore, I have to do a little something call studies too; exams are going on. So, I wrote a poem for that unseen, unsung sister of mine that lie on the hospital bed fighting with death. May god bring her to justice, and to peace.

मैं नहीं था -

जब तेरे मर्म बदन पर
चोटे पड़ी संगीन, अधर
माफ़ करना बहन , मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी प्यारी सूरत पर
गिद्ध कर गए वार, असर
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी चुनर पर
दाग लगे अटल, अचर
माफ़ करना बहन मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी काजल सी सुरमई आँखों पर
आंसू छलके, चीखें हुईं अकर्ण
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |

जब तेरी लज्जा दी क़तर
जब शर्म से झुक पड़ा तेरा सर
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |

पर तू रोना नहीं, डरना भी मत
सब बदल जायेगा वादा है मेरा |
सूरज फिर निकलेगा, चाँद फिर दिखेगा
दर्द पिघल जायेगा वादा है मेरा ||

और जो इक्के दुक्के बार, याद आ भी गई वो रात
तो तुझे भर के सीने में सुला दूंगा मैं |
गिन लेंगे तारे, गुनगुना लेंगे गीत
तुझे लोरी सुना के सब भुला दूंगा मैं  ||

नींद मुझे नहीं आयेगी पर
सिर्फ इस बात का है डर
एक ही बात सताती है, करती है असर
माफ़ करना बहन, मैं नहीं था |